Today is my birthday. Wow. How about that? Another rotation around the sun has taken place and I’ve been a witness to it. I’m never one for revelry on my birthday – it’s hard to take the self indulgence of that me-focussed love. Of course, like most of us, I do reflect about my life on the day. Everything I’ve ever done in the last 37 years has led me to this point…all that kind of stuff.
Also like most of us, my life has turned out exactly how I hadn’t imagined it! As Sri Sri John Lennon said “life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.”
There was a time when I just saw the little old man in the blanket. Of course it’s all just perception – we see what we need to see. But it’s deeper than that too. I wasn’t ready to be seen, or to have my heart touched, or to surrender my intellect in favor of compassion. It was just a little old man in a blanket laying there throwing fruit at people. Charming.
As my journey continues through the days, months and years I find more important now than ever to just focus on the moments. I was reminded last night by a great teacher that perfection lies within each moment and that result is enlightenment. If you just string together a few moments of Gods love that is within you then you will be see it everywhere else.
I’m not sure when or what the moment was when I stopped seeing the little old man in the blanket and started to see boundless love and universal energy. I can’t say that there was ever one lightbulb moment. Everything that I’d been doing was just kind of hanging out in black and white – comfortable but very neutral. When I slowly started integrating high definition colors and sounds then the man in the blanket became a sea of perfection and being happy was just easier than being bummed out.
I was dancing and singing with my Hare Krishna brothers and sisters last night. Talk about HD color and sound – their tradition does have amazing potent bhav. I’m grateful to be willing and free enough to learn from all paths and traditions.
Sometimes the potent and concise eloquence in Be Here Now fools me into thinking the practice is easier than it actually is. I get why – its important to know that the gurus (gods) love is easily accessible and does not discriminate. But it takes work. There’s so much to let go of. The ego is very powerful in the west. Competition, success, achievements and potential are very hard to play a balancing act with. We’re taught to achieve more and more and more. Experiencing bliss in every of life’s moments takes intense sadhana, the guru can only do so much. I see Maharaji-ji’s little eyes that are barely open, I see them asking me “what sadhana have you done today? how about seva?” Could be a trap but I see these things.
On this birthday, yes I am “the desire to be enlightened.”